Improper

Written 56-I11 [2025-03-12], Edited 56-I11 [2025-03-12]

Image credit: Twitter Twemoji

I was waiting in line at the self-service kiosk at McDonald’s at 1 AM. Yeah, it was one of those days. There was often something off at McDonald’s at this time of night. Many… troubled… older people, and gangs of teenagers, and sold out items on the menu.

But today when I looked at one of the few remaining tables, I saw a man attempting to eat a Big Mac with a spork and a single chopstick. His denim jacket was on backwards. He wore shorts, and a pair of jeans underneath. His baseball cap didn’t match the frame of his monocle. He consumed his tiny morsels of burger sideways. At least he smelled clean, but the smell was so strong, I wondered if I was swimming in detergent.

And every time I looked at him, he was staring at me. Direct eye contact, he was locked onto me.

I hoped against hope he didn’t say anything.

Notes

This was written in 10 minutes during a Joy of Writing meetup.